It’s cold out. Just the right combo of cold and windy that makes that one ridiculous pipe freeze up. Now that the sun has set for today, we are not getting it unfrozen. Temps are staying way down tonight, and again tomorrow. Maybe I will be able to use my kitchen faucet by Tuesday, but until then I will make do by lugging stock pots of water back and forth from the bathroom sinks. And washing dishes by hand. Ugh, I’m so spoiled. I can’t tell you how much I dislike how I sound, but I am really trying to make the best of it. For instance, did you know that slathering on a heavy layer of your favorite lotion followed by a pair of rubber gloves and submersion into hot dish water soothes even the driest and chapped skin? Go ahead, try it.

The worst part about this cold is that my older kids are out in it. They went to visit their father, as they are want to do now and again. I don’t have a problem with that at all. But now that Fourthborn is snuggled in her bed for the night, it’s really too quiet in here. I will fall asleep soon, and if they do not come home before then, I will sleep restlessly. And I will wake up at 3 am, and have to take a survey to make sure that they made it home safely. WHY? Hubby will wait up for them, do I really think that he wouldn’t tell me if something out of the ordinary happened? On some instinctual level, I guess not. Even though I know that is stupid.

And I feel stupid. If stupid feels all out of sorts and “in between” and contradictory. I’m on holiday, but puttered myself to exhaustion today clearing out corners in my home that haven’t been touched in a long long while. I’m well rested and eager to get back to work, but I dread it too because of the butt-kicking my schedule is going to give me for the next few weeks. I’ve just had one of the most pleasant and stress free holidays of my adult life, but I blinked and now it’s over so the inevitable let-down has begun. I’m losing weight (a little!) but eating like a pig (a lot!).

So, lots going on in my head. Not much of it making any sense to me right now.  Talk about a cluttered corner! The routine  of heading back to work, back to school…that will help the stupid, right? …I’ll snap out of this, right? …RIGHT???